Crab Mentality

According to www.quiettimeswithgod.com, CRAB MENTALITY is a trait common of many Filipinos. This concept is a metaphor of a bucket of crabs usually found in wet markets wherein the crabs pull each other down and trample each other to be able to escape. Crab Mentality is an unfriendly competition among individuals that involves slandering, back-biting, and trampling on another to get ahead. It is a trait that dates back to the Spanish colonization wherein the Filipino Indios heavily depended on the favor of the Spanish Insulares and made ways to damage each other’s reputation to be able to step up.

Wherever you go in the corporate world, you will definitely meet a lot of these crab-like thinking people. I have and continuously am. It doesn’t matter whether you’re working for a liquor company, for a bakeshop or even for a pharmaceutical company. A year ago, I thought I should stop working for local companies and consider working for multi-national companies where probably the system is more professional, internationally standardized and there’s probably less “politics”. I was wrong. There’s always nothing wrong with the company but with the people working in it and how their minds are set. The company is not able to control the tongues of its employees 24/7 and how its employees can damage each other just because of greed. Though companies can always control these instances at a certain level but the cause and effect is immeasurable and uncontrollable. Ultimately, crab mentality will forever exist in this wicked world. No matter where or how we look at it, we can’t blame any person, even the company or ourselves for its existence. I don't even want to focus on its existence but on how I am going to deal with it. How? By just keeping one thought in mind: My life’s goal, which is to HONOR & Please God. Let me give you some ideas on how you can actually deal with Crab Mentality.

Dealing with the “CRAB” (Person)

Step 1: You probably have an idea who among your co-workers are saying untrue things behind your back and trying to pull you down. Instead of wishing and telling yourself, “I hope this person die in any moment now!” try asking yourself, “Why does this kind of person exist in this world?” “What is his purpose?”

This person who might envy you for your greatness or intelligence, or probably because your younger and you look better than him/her, FOR WHATEVER REASON, this person does exist in this world TO CONSISTENTLY CHALLENGE YOU TO BE A BETTER PERSON. If you get mad and you try to do the same thing that person is doing, do you think it will make you a better person? I must say no. This person’s current state of mind is being used to challenge your capability to be kind, humble and love unconditionally. Treat this person with extra kindness and patience. Learn to love this person DESPITE his greed and bad intentions because you simply love God and it’s Him you want to please.

Dealing with the situation

Step 2: There might probably be work stuff and details that are affected or ruined by crab mentality. There might be projects that you’re heading and tasks were drawn to fail so things could look like crap. People may want you to look like a big failure so you either quit and resign or get terminated by your boss because of consistent failure. Instead of trying to pinpoint the mistakes and go into details why your project failed, focus on the solution and get things done professionally and in a SMARTER WAY.

If you think there are things that you cannot control or probably there might be people who are trying to sabotage you, go out of that “box” and THINK AHEAD. Accountability is the name of the game. You are accountable for your project and there are other people or departments who are working with you and are accountable for their own tasks but ultimately, you can always do things better by determining or identifying the problem, developing action plans and present the plan with the team, and implement the fastest way possible focusing on achieving the main goal of your project. Dealing with the situation professionally and decently will always keep you at a safe place, a place where no one can harm you and where you can’t even hurt yourself and other people, just doing the best you can as if you’re always doing your tasks for God.

Dealing with yourself and God

Step 3: You might be losing your grip and you just want to shout, walk away and get a bucket of beer. You might be hurting or crying inside the comfort room and telling yourself, “I can’t take this anymore! I just want to get out and have peace!” You might just be forcing yourself to stay in the corporate world because you’re saying you have to. You might have a lot of things running in your mind and pressuring you and giving you the stress that you don’t need. Just pray. Silently or while crying, just pray. Talk to the only ONE who can let anything bad taken away from your heart and from your mind. God will always do something and make something happen to help you. Even through your other officemates who are trustworthy, through small things that you encounter everyday, through your girlfriend/boyfriend or lifetime partners, through your parents or siblings and even friends. ANYTHING. God is always in control and He can take down ANYTHING that is pulling you away from Him. Just pray and ask Him to help you as you surrender “this” to Him.

God is BIGGER than ANYTHING. Just imagine how big GOD is compared to this CRAB MENTALITY. There are greater possibilities with God than man. :)


In my office

A SWEET RIDE

Life is like Surfing.

You have the whole ocean as the “world”.
The waves are the opportunities in our everyday lives.
The line-up, where everybody else is waiting for their own perfect wave to catch, represents “the” places, objects, time and people who gave us and constantly allow us to have opportunities. The line-up is where “everything” sets.

There’s a current that will constantly pull you away from your “spot” or from the line-up. Most of the time, you get pulled away unnoticed.

There’s only one way to fight the drift: PADDLE! Paddle your way back to the spot or to the line-up. I know it’s hard because you have already paddled your way out to the line-up from the shore but if you don’t paddle back, you may not only loose your chances in getting a perfect wave and have the possible “best ride” of your life, but a wild wave might also come to where you got lost and boom! Wipeout!

In catching a wave, there are times that the waves may be too big for us to get and the only way for us to go is down under. There are waves that are too small for us and we can choose to ride it smoothly and when we reach the shore, we will have to paddle back again to the line-up. Some people may find this alright but some people think this will just be a waste of time and a missed opportunity in getting a better ride.

We may have the “skill” or enough experience in reading the waves and trying to see if the next wave is “the one” for you, the good thing is you have your family and friends as the “other dudes and dudettes” or “other surfers” who are there with you on the line-up. They will help you and make sure that you get to ride a wave at least once. While there are some dudes who will challenge you and might even make you feel that he or she is damn better than you, some will not quit in pushing you to go beyond your limits. Other than that, still the saddest thing is when you surf alone.

Riding the wave is the best thing. It’s also the best feeling. Just the feeling of being able to get or catch that wave on your own is something! All of a sudden, your hard work, your arms that hurt so bad from paddling and running after that wave, and your fear of getting another “wipeout” are all gone. Swoooooooosh! You start hearing yourself saying: “Oh! It’s worth it!”

Riding a wave is the exact moment or experience in our lives where we feel “This is it!” or we just simply feel GOOD and HAPPY as if we’re floating or flying. There are a lot of things that can happen in riding a wave. You can ride it and own it! Feel awesome because you are so good at riding it. You can even do your tricks on it like trim it or do a cut back or even an aerial if you can. You can finish it up to the shore and go paddle back again for another ride. You can also fall because you can loose your balance and boom another wipeout. You can finish and just call it a day.

The best thing is you learn something new in your every ride. Even if you’re so good at surfing, you will still be surprised in what the wave has to offer you. It’s unpredictable. One thing’s for sure, you took that ride. Oh yes, you may have finished it and rode it like a “dirty bum bum claat” or you may have fallen down and the wave just wiped you out, the important thing is you took it, and you didn't give up. You helped yourself up and breathe again. Then you can tell yourself… “I think, I just think, I can call myself a surfer.” :)

Other than everything that was mentioned, there’s only one thing left, your surfboard.

Your surfboard and your leash are the things that will stick with you no matter what. When you paddle out to the line-up, when you’re on the line-up, when you’re being pulled away by the current, when you try to paddle back, when you catch a wave, ride a wave, when you’re being wiped out, and even when you give up and just call it a day, your surfboard and your leash will walk with you. It’s like God and prayer walking with you... It is the sweetest ride that will always bring you back to the shore :D

Life is like Surfing. Go and Paddle! Have a great ride! :)

@Normi2's Beachfront Resort, Taboc, San Juan, La Union